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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22829653">Regrets</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/double_negative/pseuds/double_negative'>double_negative</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Metal Gear</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Brief mention of past torture, Guilt, Kissing, M/M, Scars, brief mention of past child abuse as well</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 13:20:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>547</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22829653</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/double_negative/pseuds/double_negative</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Wiping the pain away is a task more daunting than anyone would think.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Liquid Snake/Psycho Mantis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Regrets</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>written in like half an hour on my phone, but kind comments make me live and i managed to make them kiss finally. what's next? who knows.....</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Liquid is angry, Mantis can tell. When he traces the edges of a jagged scar wrapping around his skull, like a ring, like a snake, his fingers are all over, it's all callouse, but the movement is gentle, it's seething anger, every single time, but it's not directed at Mantis himself, it's not even about people who did this to him, no, this hatred is directed at Liquid himself. "I could have prevented this, I could have been there for you" and no amount of reassurance helps to quell the guilt rising in Liquid every time he sees Mantis unmasked.</p><p>His fingertips are rough, more suited for handling a weapon, but Mantis chuckles to himself, he is a weapon, a cold unfeeling deadly force, hard and jagged to the touch. Liquid follows the thick lines of scarring, every miniscule dot left by suture or staples as if he's trying to wipe them away, his hands are soon joined by lips, trying to kiss away every mark, no matter how small it may be. When he realises finally, that he can't do anything, when every scar is a brand made on his memories more vivid there than it is on Mantis' skin, he places a soft kiss on top of where Mantis' nose was supposed to be. It doesn't tickle, Mantis barely feels the pressure over the thick tissue, but then Liquid dips to press just as soft as a kiss on Mantis' lips, it tickles. His lips are soft, a sharp contrast to his fingers, to Mantis' own lips, always chapped from malnutrition and disinterest in upkeep.</p><p>Mantis tries to speak, but the moment he opens his mouth to form words, Liquid deepens the kiss, always so hungry, so eager to compensate for his perceived failure and Mantis has to pour his feelings into thoughts, washing over them both while all he can manage audibly is weak shuddering exhales against Liquid's mouth. "It's not your fault", he tries to convey to him, it's not his fault, it's not anyone's fault besides this world's where the only response to any anomaly is to dissect first and think later. </p><p>And Mantis is an anomaly, now even more so, a freakshow of outside perfectly matching his insides, fractured, damaged. He doesn't mourn changes to his appearance, he's carried scars for as long as he can remember himself, cruelty of other children and his own father, chaos of flames and war, what's a vivisection add to that? Not much. The only thing he really misses is his hair, if only because it felt nice when Liquid's fingers threaded through it, toying with fire. The same fingers that trace over the marks, trying to flatten, soothe away the glossy red or his imperfections, the same fingers that reach under the hem of his tight-fitting shirt, peeling away at it like a second skin. It doesn't matter where they reach, because they're already deep under his skin, deep where his bones lie, grasping around his black shriveled heart.</p><p>Liquid's kisses are harsh, feverish with guilt and anger, tinged with awful canteen coffee and now it's Mantis' turn to try and wipe it all clean, so he smiles into the pressure as best as he can manage with his torn mouth and gives in.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i like to hc mantis as touch-repulsed, but honestly let. him. heal.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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